Circle of Life: How to Recognize Patterns to Build Healthy Relationships
Life reflects your own thoughts back to you. ~ Napoleon Hill
Patterns follow us everywhere. Think of these patterns as a circle of words, tones, and actions that reveal information about us. And these circles of life reveal important messages. What you send out to another comes back to you in the exact same fashion, thereby completing your circle.
The heart centered question is do we see or notice what our circle contains?
Our most important relationships have a pattern or circle which can be positive or negative.
At the end of the day, our circles of life empower us or tear us down. There is no in between. So, let’s make sure you are empowered!
Positive circles contain the distinct values of acceptance, appreciation, and love.
How do you feel when you are accepted and appreciated for going the extra mile? It feels good! You feel better about your loved one and they feel better about you. You complete your circle with good intentions, sending them appreciation and love.
Negative circles have the distinct values of criticism, judgment, and withdrawal.
Notice how you feel when you are judged and criticized? It hurts. Ouch! You want to lash out at your loved one or go crawl in a hole. You complete your circle with apprehension and non-acceptance. You don’t want to hear it anymore!
Where the Rubber Meets the Road
The skinny here is we don’t accept each other often enough. We appreciate our loved ones at times. We love each other and tell each other that at times too. But that’s not enough.
Love doesn’t cut it by itself. You see half of America in divorce court and most of them still love each other. What’s missing?
Acceptance says I take you just as you are right now, warts and all. Acceptance is acknowledgment of the truth. Acceptance is being OK with what is, not what should be.
Notice your awareness of whether or not you are accepting of your loved one. That doesn’t mean you stop helping them improve, look the other way when they don’t do the right thing, or even agree with them.
It means to cease trying to change them into something you desire and accept them for who they are right now in this moment, whatever that maybe.
Which brings us back to your circle.
When you utilize the positive, empowering, and enduring values in your life, your circle will contain love, appreciation, and acceptance. As a result, your Heart evolves.
Positive Circles – How to Begin
Ensure that the ones closest to you feel appreciated, loved, and accepted for who they are. Go for it and watch it come back to you to complete your empowered circle.
Also, give yourself a break and appreciate you for who you are. You may not be perfect, but you are good enough right now. Acknowledge this.
Notice the actions, tones, and words that make up your circle. Does it contain what you want it to? Throw the ingredients of appreciation, love, and acceptance into your circle to energize and empower your life and the ones closest to you as well.
Start slow and keep adding the good stuff to your circle. You will be glad you did!
After reading this I realized that I was never taught the importance of building relationships with others. I heard my parents tell us about maintaining good grades and making sure that we follow rules, but seldom we were taught on how to build relationship with others. Whatever i have learned, has been through observation of what I have seen and observed around me. I have been blessed and lucky to have had such good role models in my life such as teachers and friends….But with todays technology I have seen where people in the office even in schools dont bother to build relationships…it is like everyone is too busy to care or talk…..we text each other…we send emails to the person in the office next door to us….its a crazy world, but we can change it one person at a time…and thats what your doing. Nice. I like this article.